Immersing myself in a project


Are there things in your life that you immerse yourself in, things that you can’t wait to get back to, that call for you to come back when you are away? Since I made the decision to go for my life purpose of expressing myself through writing I have been immersing myself in writing.   I have logged in many hours at my computer tapping away on the keyboard watching the words march across the screen. I am in the process of writing a book length narrative on the 30 or so years I spent dealing with some difficult issues in a therapeutic setting. Simply put I am writing about the time I spent in therapy. I am writing this therapy story as I call it because it felt like it needed to be told, needed to be cleared out to make room for more writing. Therapy was a big part of my life, made up a big part of who I am.

I spend as much time on it as I can. It is taking on a life of its own. What started out sporadic has turned fairly regular. Sometimes I think, yeah, this is what I am trying to say, this is pretty good. Then I think, sheez, it’s just a bunch of crap. What’s the point. But through it all I push myself onward. I tell myself I can’t make a judgment about it till its complete. This is quite unusual for me. Sticking to something in spite of my negative side harping on me that I’m wasting my time totally immersing myself.

Right now I am putting in every little bit of experience or information. Sometimes is just seems like one big mess. First I work on one part, then I dropped that and go onto another part, then I go back to the beginning. Next thing you know I’m sidetracked on some research. I have a file on my computer with all sorts of chapters or sections and outlines and notes.

Surprisingly enough while I am working on it I am engrossed. I look forward to the time when I can go back to it. I almost feel inpatient when I can’t be working on it. This is what I hoped for, to get so involved in writing something that I would develop momentum, a sense of purpose, where it feels like this is what I want to do, what I am supposed to be doing. This is new for me. It is a good thing yet also a bit frustrating because it seems my blog gets put on the back burner. What are your experiences with  immersing yourself in a personal project?  Is it challenging?  Rewarding?  Is it new for you like it is for me?

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5 responses to “Immersing myself in a project

  1. I too find I multi-task, ADD patterns, back burner stuff more and more as I have changed in age. As a strong, independent woman, I have accomplished many things, done much of what I set out to do. I’ve thought on this many times and have decided this is the age for me to flow and be. The age of becoming is over now, and the age of being has emerged. When I try and create from structure, when I control my day, i seem to lose my muse. Still, I am grateful to have learned how to structure my day, how to accomplish important tasks. It’s just that now I’m using them as tools and once done, like any tool, they go back into the toolbox awaiting my next need.

    • “The age of becoming is over now, and the age of being has emerged.”

      I love this. It is a wonderful way of looking at being at this stage of life, as the title of your blog, “Life’s Third Trimester.” I feel a push to end the emerging and get on with the being. Thanks for you thoughtful comment. janice

  2. Hello!
    The format changed and I got confused. Change is good and I discovered on my own how to “get in” to make a comment.I think I am subscribed twice. DUH!
    Well, I can immerse myself in a good book and not want to pause – because life happens – and I can’t wait to return to the story. David often says, “Hello are you there?” I am just beginning to return to my writing. I find that I am writing in my mind and I become so preoccupied with it that I have to write it down. Mostly it is poetry which I think is my style. And I would like to be immersed in it and of course I need the balance. Love the idea of the muse. I am asking mine to sit on my shoulder and keep whispering in my ear. I do hear her – my muse is a girl – because I do hear her even when in the midst of tasks that need to be done. I want to be immersed and have something that is my own – my writing.
    This new or a return my soul….
    Cathy

    • Yeah, I know, Cathy, I wanted a new theme. It’s liking changing my hair color, which I don’t do anymore so I guess I transfer that urge to my blogs look. I’m sorry you were confused. I know the consensus is that one should keep the same look. sigh, I caved. Your writing does come out like poetry. It is a very unique style. Keep listening to your muse. Keep writing. Love, Janice

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